pulled pork

Just in case you were all unaware, I am fairly lazy when it comes to cooking.  I enjoy eating a nice meal when I come home from work that includes both protein and fresh vegetables, maybe a nice warm crusty piece of Italian bread, but I do not want to put any effort forth to actually prepare said meal.  I'm sure I've mentioned this before, but in my fantastic imaginary life I come home and dinner is fresh from the oven and waiting for me when I get out of work.  I eat at the table every night with my boyfriend or a close friend and share funny anecdotes about our day at work (because surely those exist).

Reality:  I settle for frozen entrees (fancy name for TV dinners) - maybe some herbed chicken, mashed potatoes, and something resembling a vegetable.  What I waste in money I save in time.  Four to six minutes in the microwave and dinner is hot and ready to be eaten at my desk or in my bed while I watch old episodes of Gilmore Girls.  I've only eaten at the table 5 or so times and only when I have company.  Sometimes I even treat myself to a glass of Coke even though the caffeine makes my heart beat a little funny.  It's worth it.  I feel a little shamed buying these dinners at the store and even a little guilty after I eat them.  I feel like a failure at taking care of myself or completing even the most basics of tasks (feeding myself).  At least I take the food out of the plastic container and onto a plate.

I think my parents understand this, as they got me a slow cooker and a little personal griddle for Christmas.  Despite being comfortable using technology, something about kitchen gadgets makes me wary.  Every day when I come home from work, I take a look at the griddle and the slow cooker as I'm microwaving my food.  They look easy enough, but I'm scared.  It wasn't until earlier in the week that I finally decided to use the slow cooker.  It seemed easy enough on paper.  Put food in, turn cooker on, leave for work, return, eat.  I had visions of my apartment burning down while I left my food simmering away, the slow cooker overflowing everywhere, the food either being overcooked or undercooked when I returned.

I put away my fears and planned a pulled pork dinner.  I picked up pork and instructions for cooking from my Dad during a trip to Connecticut and began with trepidation.

Pulled Pork
recipe from my Dad

Ingredients:

• Boston butt/pork shoulder (mine was 5.5lbs, cut in half so only 2.75 was cooked)
• Mesquite barbecue seasoning rub
• olive oil
• 1-2 tbsp of liquid smoke
• 1 yellow onion
• 1 jar barbecue sauce (I used Sweet Baby Ray's)

1. Prep the night before.  I had forgotten/fallen asleep and these steps happened at 1:30am.  I do not recommend that.  Cut up onion and place in the bottom of the slow cooker insert to keep the meat from touching the bottom.
2.  Pat dry pork and rub with a tiny bit of olive oil.  Afterward, rub with barbecue seasoning and place on top of onions.  Place insert in fridge overnight.
3.  In the morning, place insert into slow cooker and pour half a bottle of barbecue sauce and the 1-2 tablespoons of liquid smoke over the meat.
4.  Turn slow cooker on low and cook for 11 hours.
5.  Meat is done when it can be pulled apart easily with two forks.  You will wan to pull the pieces of meat apart and put them in a separate bowl.  Remove fat and discard with juices and onions.
6.  Add desired amount of extra barbecue sauce.  Serve alone or on a roll.

granola bars

I'm trying to be good*.  I could have made those sugar cookies I've been sitting on for a while, but I decided I'd try my hand at granola bars because those are healthy, right?  Chocolate chip granola bars?  I've had a jar of honey from my friend's farm sitting in my cupboard for several years now.  The internet tells me that honey doesn't ever go bad, and if I can't trust the internet, who can I trust?  Unfortunately, the honey had solidified into a crystal-ly mass in the mason jar.  The internet also tells me that if I soak the jar in boiling water it will return to its original form.

Photo from Jackie Norris

So I boil the jar in a medium-sized pot of water and attempt to mix the rest of the ingredients together while I wait.  All goes well until I hit the brown sugar and I remember that my brown sugar has also solidified into a hard mass.  For this, I have no internet tips.  I probably could have looked something up, but my hands were all sticky and washing them off proved to be too much effort.  So I decided to dampen the brown sugar block in water and then use a cheese grater to  break it apart.  This was a great idea in theory.  In practice, it basically turned into brown sugar goop.  Between the goop and the hot honey, these granola bars are a little on the, uh, chewy/moist side.

* No, I'm not.  I just ate pumpkin cheesecake directly out of the box with a fork.

Granola Bars
recipe from Jackie Norris

Ingredients

2 cups rolled oats

3/4 cup brown sugar, packed

1 t. ground cinnamon

1 cup flour

3/4 cup chocolate chips (or dried fruit)

3/4 t. salt

1/2 cup honey

1 egg, beaten

1/2 cup canola oil

2 t. vanilla

Preheat the oven to 350. Either line a 9×13 pan with parchment or grease thoroughly. In a large bowl, mix oats, brown sugar, cinnamon, flour, chocolate chips and salt. Add remaining ingredients, gently mixing it all together. Press the mixture into prepared pan and bake for 25-30 minutes. 

stuff

I haven't forgotten about this blog or the promise to cook more food.  But man oh man, 2011 has been rough so far.  Recently I've barely even had the energy to stand up for very long, let alone go get groceries or cook something.  It has felt like it's been one hit to my health after the other, leaving me sitting complaining in bed.  I've eaten a shameful amount of food that can be microwaved and for a brief stint I ate nothing but applesauce and Jello as it was the only thing I could swallow with my sore throat.  And oh, delivery.  Sweet sweet delivery.  Chinese food, cheeseburgers, and wraps delivered to my door in less than thirty minutes.  Bliss.

All I have wanted to do after getting out of the hospital on Saturday (after taking a much needed nap) is eat.  Sunday I was feeling a little better, and I actually decided to cook something.  It wasn't much of an undertaking, and most people find this kind of gross.  But it was exactly the simple/mildly hearty/iron-rich/comforting food that I needed.  I made Stuff.

Back when I lived at home, my mother would make stuffed peppers for dinner every now and then.  I haven't really been into peppers since I was a kid (insert story about how I'd grab fresh peppers from my grandfather's garden and just take a bite out of them here (with a brief stint a few years ago where I'd eat them sauteed, but that ended abruptly after a hit of the stomach bug one Easter)) so I would often just scoop out the insides of the stuffed peppers and eat that.  The insides were the Stuff.  After several years of this behavior, it came to my attention that I could just make Stuff whenever I wanted without having to go through all the effort of gutting peppers, stuffing then, cooking then, and throwing them away after.

Stuff has been the perfect food for when I'm feeling sort of peckish but want something filling and bland.  Because god, do I love bland food.

Kelly's Stuff
adapted from Mom's Stuffed Peppers

- 1lb ground beef
- 1 serving white rice
- ketchup/tomato sauce

1.  Brown ground beef on stove top in a skillet.  Drain excess water/fat when done.
2.  While browning, start cooking the rice.  I use generic minute rice because I'm lazy and poor.
3.  When both of the above are complete, mix the two together in a big bowl.
4.  Top with ketchup or tomato sauce to taste.
5.  Try not to eat it around anyone, as they will judge you.