betty crocker

I mostly save my cake eating for birthdays.  Occasionally, I will bake cupcakes.  I bought cake tins a few years ago and, like most of my kitchen gadgets, have only been used two or three times.  Mostly for birthdays and once for those Pillsbury cinnamon buns that come in the vacuum-sealed tube.  Like my favorite homemade coffee cake, I seem to only feel comfortable making and eating cake for some sort of holiday or celebration.  Sometimes, however, I just feel like eating a cake.


I am not yet as skilled (read: motivated) as to bake a cake from scratch and Betty Crocker cake mix was on sale at Target for $1.  I bought a gold cake mix and a tub of chocolate frosting (a departure from my usual buttercream/cream cheese frosting fixation).  I made a point not to buy the whipped frosting, as it is the same price for frosting that has been injected and whipped with air.  So far, everything is going smoothly.

Once home, I place the ingredients and all needed out on my butcher block.  I set out my cake pans and poured the cake batter into them.  So far, so good.  I run into a little trouble when I realize both cake tins can't fit completely flat in my miniature oven, but that's okay.  I make do.  My kitchen timer goes off and I take the pans out of the oven to cool.  Everything looks fine.  After a while, I remember that I have cake cooking and try to get them out of the pans.

I was fooled by Wilson's.  Non-stick nonsense.  I run a knife along the edges and assume the cakes will flop out like usual.  Instead, the cake does not budge.  I slide my hands gently under the cakes, prying them away from the bottom of the pans.  The first one crumbles, but I figure I will just stick that one at the bottom and we'll be none the wiser.  We'll just cover that bad boy in frosting.

I take the frosting from the shopping bag and am alarmed at how light the canister is.  I take a look at the label.  Whipped!  How did that happen?!  I angrily throw it in the microwave and smear it cover my broken cake bits.  Now comes the top layer.

 This doesn't go much better.  I think this picture pretty much sums it up:

I try to patch it up by using frosting as an adhesive.  It looks kind of okay at this point.  I go to cut a piece later in the evening and the entire thing crumbles to bits.

Just so this entry isn't so depressing; here's a completely normal looking cake that my sister made for my dad's birthday: